When it comes to dieting, you can stamp a huge red FAIL across my forehead. I haven’t really counted calories or stuck to any specific regimen in months. Sure, I pay some attention to obvious pitfalls like soda and chocolate, but I also give in and let myself indulge almost any time I want. I honestly can’t remember the last time I exercised on purpose, either.
The trouble is, now I’m beginning to notice my clothes fitting more tightly and I’m getting heartburn after eating the mildest foods. Those are my typical warning signs that the food is sticking around longer than I want it to. I’m either going to have to start taking control of my diet and exercise or resign myself to buying larger clothes and feeling crappy for the rest of my life.
So that’s the failure part of the post. Here’s the thing about rewards: It is really easy to make up a reason to give yourself something you want. In my case, I tend to reward myself with food and beverages.
I managed to go to work and stay there like I was supposed to even though it was a hard day? I deserve a trip to the sports bar! A few beers and some fried foods won’t hurt if I only indulge when it’s a reward for good behavior, right? Sure. A blowout day doesn’t have permanent repercussions if it only happens once every few months. No problem.
Except I live in a house with 4 other people. Someone is bound to have some reason for rewarding us all with a great restaurant meal every weekend. In fact, if i think really hard about it, I could come up with a reason to deserve eating out every single day of the week. It’s easy to rationalize poor food choices, especially when life is so crammed full of crazy schedules and sleepless nights.
The trouble is not with the rewards. Of course I deserve to pamper myself when life is tough. Everyone should treat themselves well when they are stressed. The trouble is with the things I’m using to reward myself. I would probably feel just as good about a new jar of bath salts as I would feel about a plate of creamy pasta. It is possible to find treats that don’t make me feel bloated and push me toward a larger pair of jeans. Food and drink rewards are simply a habit I’ve formed over the past twenty or thirty years.
Habits are tough to break. Every single type of habit has more layers than a 10-foot tall wedding cake. I love the food and the drinks when i go out, but I also love the excitement of the idea of going out to eat. The restaurant is always filled with people who are happy to be there. The waiter, waitress, or barkeep chatters with me, which is nice even if it is their job. I get to choose a meal from a large list of wonderful items, and I don’t have to cook any of it. When I’m done eating, the dishes are whisked away like magic and I can sit back and enjoy conversation with my dining partner. If I’m lucky, there’s a good game on a TV somewhere nearby, too. Eating out is an experience! How am I going to replace that experience with something that doesn’t include empty calories?
It will help when I get back on track with my food and exercise, but I’m afraid the eating out is gonna have to go. Did I mention it’s also expensive? Sheesh! So here’s to my search for a new rewarding habit that is less detrimental to my wallet, waistline, and self-esteem.




